The behavior of human beings is a fascinating subject for me. Psychologists usually define it as the manifestation of personality or the expression of the particularities of people.
Since I was little I observed the behavior of adults, young people, and children: my parents, teachers, and friends. Also, people I knew didn't like me, and as I've grown and matured, I've focused on mine, which is really the only one I can take responsibility for.
Over time, I have researched and talked with professionals and have had some interesting revelations that have completely changed the way I perceive what is going on outside of me and have brought me a lot of growth and well-being.
For example, I have understood that when a person constantly criticizes and judges others, even though he wants to appear superior, it is very likely that he has a serious self-esteem problem. In other words, when we hear someone say "you don't do anything or you are useless", we are most likely dealing with someone who has that concept of himself, whether he is aware of it or not.
Now, if understanding that someone who permanently judges is not superior but quite the opposite was interesting to me, my impact was greater when I understood the usefulness that dealing with someone like that could bring me. For example, if I became aware that this behavior bothered me a lot, applying the Law of the Mirror, which states that the external world is a reflection of our internal world, I understood that this person could be showing me an aspect of myself that I should review and to get better. Probably, on some occasions, I had similar behavior, criticized, and judged others or myself. But he could also warn me that I didn't feel enough either, because people who know their true value are not affected by the opinions of others. They know who they are and do not need any external validation.
In the same way, it happened when I was facing someone aggressive or violent, who really felt fear or frustration and therefore perceived a reality that attacked him. Another example would be when I treated someone who was arrogant, who really felt insecure and perceived a reality that they could not handle, etc., taking place the same analysis regarding any aspect of me that I also had to modify.
Once I understood this, I began to see people from another perspective, I stopped labeling them and began to appreciate them as teachers. Some of these people that I previously avoided or judged began to provide me with opportunities to identify my own problems, learn and grow, and magically, as I worked on my own beliefs and behaviors and healed, my reality and relationships became more and more enjoyable and enriching. Really, it was not that there were no adverse or difficult circumstances, but that the deeper my personal transformation was, the more peace I achieved, chose and gave better responses to my circumstances, and obtained more positive results, which led me to a state of greater fullness and gratitude.
It is not an easy goal. It takes time to take responsibility in this way, be honest with yourself, identify your limiting beliefs and behaviors, replace them with others that empower you, and make it easier for you to trust yourself. But, I do not believe in the impossible, and achieving it is a miraculous change that is well worth the effort to experience. The simple fact of having discovered that what you see outside is a projection of what is inside you, and knowing that you have the power to empower yourself and change your reality is already a great advance. Ready to start?
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